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    June 23

    我想要的...

    结束了毕业以后的第二份工作,不知道是什么心情,毕竟这次的离开是想了很久以后才做的决定...
    不得不承认,这里的工作比较清闲,同事也都对我很好,可是,我很清楚,这一切都不是我想要的...
    很多时候,我会被一个问题困惑很久,例如"你到底想要什么?"
    而我的回答其实很简单:我不知道...
    事实其实就是这个样子,我总是觉得自己一直以来所经历的,或者正在经历的事情都不是自己想要的,而真正要我去面对这个问题的时候,我是无知的...
    总是固执的认为很多东西都不是自己想要的那种,所以一直都在不停的选择,不停的漂流,我不知道接下来会怎么样,只是希望会离自己想要的近一点,再近一点...
    时间其实是个坏东西,它会很快的让人老去,这是我们最大的悲哀...
    总感觉自己还该在妈妈的怀抱里,无忧无虑的做着自己的白日梦...
    却又在睁开眼睛的时候发现,自己的一些同龄人都已经是孩子的妈妈了,瞬间觉得自己真的老去了好多,以至于自己都还没来得及去反应...
    很多人眼里的我是快乐的,是自由自在的...
    就如同我也会经常这么看待别人一样...
    我总是在看三毛的文字,然后憧憬着和她一样的生活,和她一样的经历,包括和她一样的爱情...
    我会穿着很长很长的花裙子,然后傻傻的以为自己和三毛近了那么一点点...
    对于撒哈拉的向往,对于饭后海边的散步,对于她和荷西的热烈的爱恋,都只是单纯的追求...
    我也有自己想去的地方,并且也在为之付出努力...
    那里的历史,那里的文化,那里的环境,包括那里的人,都将是我接下来很长一段时间要去了解和学习的...
    一直想写一些关于那里的文字,可却一直不知该从哪里入手,感觉怎么写都算是一种破坏,还是暂时作为保留吧,等有一天我真的从那里归来时再做总结...
    未来一段时间内可能又要在家呆着了,恩,希望不久后会有好的消息吧...
     

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